Cerita Lawak: Things Adults Learn From Kids

– There is no such thing as child-proofing your house.- If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.

– A 4 years-old’s voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.

– 4 If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing pound puppy underwear and a superman cape.

– It is strong enough however to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 by 20 foot room.

– Baseballs make marks on ceilings.

– You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on.

– When using the ceiling fan as a bat you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit.

– A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.

– The glass in windows (even double pane) doesn’t stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.

– When you hear the toilet flush and the words “Uh-oh;” it’s already too late.

– Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.

– A six year old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36 year old man says they can only do it in the movies.

– A magnifying glass can start a fire even on an overcast day.

– If you use a waterbed as home plate while wearing baseball shoes it does not leak – it explodes.

– A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq foot house 4 inches deep.

– Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a four year old.

– Duplos will not.

– Play Dough and Microwave should never be used in the same sentence.

– Super glue is forever.

– McGyver can teach us many things we don’t want to know.

– Ditto Tarzan.

– No matter how much Jello you put in a swimming pool you still can’t walk on water.

– Pool filters do not like Jello.

– VCR’s do not eject PB&J sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.

– Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.

– Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.

– You probably do not want to know what that odor is.

– Always look in the oven before you turn it on.

– Plastic toys do not like ovens.

– The fire department in San Diego has at least a 5 minute response time.

– The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earth worms dizzy.

– It will however make cats dizzy.

– Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.

– Quiet does not necessarily mean don’t worry.

– A good sense of humor will get you through most problems in life (unfortunately, mostly in retrospect).


Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: